i hardly ever post on sundays. i hardly ever write words that are incredibly personal and can be read by anyone. but this is my outlet and some things just must be written. as fate would have it, an answer i didnt want to see, came. reality that i wished wasn’t, is. one week ago i wrote my heart here and shared how i will and will remain trusting in a plan that is bigger than my own. a plan that sees further than the two steps ahead i can see. that now, as reality has become, that i will hold on to those words i’ve spoken and even if i do not understand the whirl i feel im in, He has always brought me through it and brought me down a path that is better than i could have planned.

as fate would have it a very good friend flew home tonight from NYC. that friend needed a ride. as fate would have it, this is the night that i needed that very good friend and to have comfort with someone that has known you for many years. this is the friend that you can go months, probably even years, and not see and then they are there, standing in front of you and it seems you haven’t missed a beat. they will just hug you. they will listen. they will give you there time.  i’ll spare you the details. i just am reminded of the incredible comfort there is in friends that are constant and family that is unwaivering. so as i sit here, the only person under this roof, at 2:24 a.m.- I’m barely awake yet not able to go to sleep. i feel exhausted and my body aches. writing is the only thing that feels helpful. maybe this wont get read, but i need to write. this is to thank the ones that are always there. i know you have them too, to never take forgranted the place they have in your life.

i returned home minutes ago to read a letter that good friend left on my nightstand. …”you taught me life often turns out different then expected, but one should always make the best of each situation and soak in the beauty of the world we live.” The letter is long but this excerpt is quite encouraging and exactly what i need to even say to myself tonight. the reality is, timing is one thing you cant control yet it speaks louder than circumstances or feelings. timing is the key that unlocks the door. but i know there is that constant that remains my security and He is the one to draw near to.

as i drove that friend home, a song came on. i sat singing it and drinking in the words. it’s by an artist i just love. Allen Stone. these words are perfect. it is possible to have a deep care and concern for someone, want the best for them and to honor what their heart needs, even if what that means is nowhere near what you want/need.  so i’ll listen to this song a few more times and fall into a slumber. listen to his words, his entire CD is incredible. it’s much more powerful sang, but you get the point.


…and love is hard. either is flourishes or it starves.

and i would love to give my heart. i just cant pull the trigger in the dark.

well now we’ve come to this, we both agreed that this love ain’t bliss.

but before we cut these ties, there’s something i just need to emphasize.

well i pray all your wishes come true. and if you’re in need, help is offered to you.

…and i pray for peace, love, and prosperity and may all your dreams become reality.

and love needs pain. just like the sunshine needs rain.

without the love shining, all of this water falls in vain.

well now we’ve come to this. we both agreed that this love aint bliss.

but before we cut these ties, there’s something i just need to emphasize.

well i pray all your wishes come true. and if you’re in need, help is offered to you.

and i pray for peace, love and prosperity. and may all your dreams become reality.

now we’ve come to this. now we’ve come to this.


you can listen to it here – it’s called reality.


~ by Andria on May 2, 2010.

7 Responses to “reality”

  1. What a powerful post! This has encouraged me to keep moving on through this rough time im going through. Thanks for the encouragement!
    P.S. I just LOVE all your photos, you have such a talented gift!

  2. What a beautiful song, the words are all too true! Your talent, your beauty, your kind heart, and most of all your faith will always carry you to many good places. I love you & remember I am only a phone call away!

  3. Incredible post…more often than not, I come across a post and I think to myself “I’m not the only one in this world experiencing this” It’s comforting and it’s humbling. You have a way with words, a way I soooo completely appreciate and admire 🙂 Lately more than ever I’ve had to remind myself… God is the same today as I fight for joy as He was in the BEST of times; it’s just a matter of perspective. Thank you for sharing!

  4. wow thank you for writing. i was so hesitant to post this but just even you who commented, Im sure there were others who read it and identified. so thats why its worth sharing something so personal. thank you for sharing that this is an encouragement to what your going through as well, C and A. it means a lot and thank you for taking the time to tell me.

  5. awesome! glad you got the album! you will love it! he actually played tonight in Seattle!

    • Yeah, I realized that and tried to get tickets… 😦 too late. LOVE the album though, reminds me a lot of James Morrison. Hope you’re having a great week! Love the new pics 🙂

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